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Idiots in the mirror.

November 14th, 2008

There are numerous reasons why a person should obey the speed limit. Safety. Legality. Even energy conservation and a smaller carbon footprint. I ignore them

I drive fast.

In a world full of vices, it’s about all I have left. I love to drive. Every time I get in my car to commute, I have 25 miles from point A to B. About twenty of those miles are on eight-lane highway. Might as well make the most of them. So I drive.

But not last Wednesday night. As I merged onto the interstate, I fell a few cars back and a couple of lanes over from one of Omaha’s finest. That was it for the late rush hour rally.

I’m allergic to boring. And nothing sounds more boring than driving I-80 while doing the speed limit behind a cop. I thought I was in for the dullest night of my life. I was wrong.

I hadn’t been behind the squad car for more than a minute when I noticed a set of headlights in my rearview mirror. It was an SUV. And it was doing 20 miles over the limit. About the time it passed me was also about the time the driver saw the cop.

Hello, brake lights.

The guy was in a seven-passenger Suburban and suddenly had the unenviable task of making himself inconspicuous. He dropped back in traffic, made a couple of lane changes, and ended up behind me.

Soon enough, another set of headlights was making a move in the outer lane of what was now a group of more than fifteen cars with Officer Friendly leading the pack. The driver of that car also found his brake pedal. After a few seconds, he fell in line with the rest of us.

This happened ten times before I found my exit, but I could have watched it all night long. I suppose this is the same reason that America’s Funniest Videos is still in production after two decades. No matter how many guys you see take a baseball to the groin – “Ball three!” – it never ceases to be disturbingly hilarious. But I digress.

That night, I was looking forward to something. I was stymied. I ended up enjoying something else even more.

The next time you’re trying to solve a business problem, take that into consideration. Undoubtedly, someone’s going to screw up your plans. You will be thwarted. The easiest or most enjoyable path will be blocked.

When it happens, you can use it as an excuse to produce mediocre results. Or you can check your rearview mirror, watch the idiots behind you, and find another solution.

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